Skinny Me

    This morning I weigh 53.4 kg. To Americans that's under 118 lbs or 8 stone 6 lbs to Britons. I've never weighed less than 120. I'm not anorexic, my self image is not distorted. I'm happy with who I am, but right now I don't look that beautiful. Two months after crashing my bike I've lost 8 percent of my body weight.

    I've discovered one can lose weight by crashing your bike, breaking a few bones, and trying to feed yourself for a month. Believe me, the left-overs of lasagna and soup from the neighbors won't make any difference. I'm being fed every evening by my Italian neighbors. It's great food, cooked carefully mainly by Gogo from Verona who, besides being a powerful and practical muratore (house builder), has been a restaurant owner in South America. The menu is eclectic but based solidly on pasta, pomodori, cipolle, alio, and olive oil (tomato, onion, and garlic). Fish on fridays, and lots of seasonal zucchini. Lots! Salads are not served every night, nor is there any ban on vino, pane, olive oil dressings or batter-fried tid-bits. But I'm losing weight, something I thought impossible for a man who has weighed 125lbs all his adult life.

      The secret is that I don't eat three big meals every day. I don't have the energy or the ability to shop, store, and prepare enough food for that kind of consumption. I make my own bread and every morning I have several cups of tea with as much toast and marmalade as I want. Sometimes I have a bowl of sweet, fruity muesli; and sometimes I'll make myself a brunch of toast, bacon and eggs. Lunch? Almost never. Snacks? Peanut butter and honey sandwiches; bruschetta with prosciutto, formaggio, pomodori, and alio; fagioli cannellini with tuna, cipolla and olive oil. Lots of hot tea with milk and a dash of sugar. Fizzy water and often a couple of tablets of aspirin or paracetamol. That's my proven diet for those who want to get seriously skinny.

       It's like insomnia. To cure insomnia, get up at six, get busy, don't nap, do stuff, get good and tired, and go to bed at your regular time: ten o'clock or whatever. Force yourself. To cure overeating, get up at six, get busy, don't nap, do stuff, get good and tired, have supper and go to bed at your regular time. Summer is a good time, and a natural time, to lose lots of weight. Who wants to sit around, sweating, at a big table full of food? Give me a bottle of fizzy water, a couple of crackers, maybe a sweet carrot, a sloppy tomato, mozzarella with real basil; and I'm outa here. To the swimming pool with a book or the lawn mower under a hot sun.

     But don't listen to me. I've crashed a bike and I've skipped a lot of meals. I'm too skinny to be credible.